The First Horse

Poseidon is the god of oceans and earthquakes. He controls all waters, has his own underwater palace, a wife, and many children. Yet, like all gods, Poseidon gets bored easily. Amphitrite, his wife, was okay, but she was just a Nereid, and ever since she experienced Mountain Dew, she’s been a little crazy. So Poseidon went hunting for something- or someone new.

He rose up out of the sea and morphed into a hawk, where he could look for something that will attract his attention. Looking down on the Earth, Poseidon saw mortal girls shopping, wind spirits singing, and water nymphs gossiping. Looking up at the heavens, he saw Hera, Aphrodite, Artemis, and Demeter sitting on Mount Olympus. Hera and Aphrodite were arguing, (no surprise) Artemis was making a new bow and arrow, and Demeter was weaving a basket. She had several more besides her.

Which goddess is worthy enough for me? Poseidon thought. Hera is married to Zeus, ignorant, full of herself, always mad, always complaining, and always jealous of everyone (yes, I agree, she’s got lots of problems. I don’t know why Zeus married her). Aphrodite’s good looking and blonde, but she’s so bossy and also full of herself. Artemis isn’t in a relationship, and never will be.

 So that leaves Demeter. She’s single and nice. Harvesting crops didn’t sound to exiting, and I know nothing about agriculture, but she’s available. Poseidon flew to Mount Olympus, and hid where Demeter couldn’t see him. Then he caused a small earthquake (being the god of earthquakes, and all) and watched the goddesses, hoping they would move.

Hera and Aphrodite stopped talking. Then, “What, in Zeus’s tunic, was that?” Hera asked.

 “An earthquake, you genius. Ever felt the heavens shake? You should know: you’re so clumsy that every time you move, all the clouds get messed up in my hair.”

“Oh, yeah? You’re one to talk! You were born from pieces of Uranus and sea foam, and even older than my father, Cronus!”

“You’re always trying to get rid of anyone who is prettier or smarter than you- and that’s everyone! - because you think that you know everything, and can’t stand anyone who’s better than you!” Aphrodite shouted.

“You do that too!”

It went on like that for a while. Poseidon thought, time for more power! And created a slight hurricane.

“Why’s it so windy? Hera demanded. There’s never wind on Olympus… unless someone summons it.”

“What’s Poseidon up to now?” Aphrodite asked.

“Making sure that no one else gets born from his sea foam,” Hera muttered. Artemis rolled her eyes. “What? That’s probably what he’s doing!”

“You’re just jealous Aphrodite’s prettier than you,” Artemis challenged. “And don’t argue with me! She the goddess of love and beauty. You’re the goddess of what? Housing and marriage. And cows. Who cares about that?”

Well, they’re not leaving, Poseidon thought. Especially now that Artemis has joined the fight.

“You two just need to stop fighting, and consider each other,” Artemis said, calmly. “Hera is the goddess of marriage and cows, and Aphrodite is the goddess of love and beauty. Can’t change that.”

“You know what I can change, Artemis? The shape of your face, after I pound it in!”

“Lay off of her Hera! She’s just a girl,” noted Aphrodite.

I’ll just have to bring Demeter to me, he thought. Demeter had been sitting quietly, minding her own business. She knew not to get in Hera and Aphrodite’s way when they were having a fight.

“You know what?” chirped Hera. “I think that you’re all jealous of me!”

“What! No one even likes you!

“You back-stabbing, ugly little-“

And I know exactly how!  He summoned the winds and slowly, blew one of Demeter’s flower baskets away, toward the woods. He was sure she would follow.

“What the...” she said, and went after her basket. Poseidon blew the basket to behind the tree, where he was hiding.  Even though it was far away from Hera, Aphrodite, and Artemis, he could still slightly hear them shouting at each other.

When Demeter was in the position where Poseidon wanted her to be, he stepped out from the shadows, and revealed himself. “Hello Demeter. You look lovely today.” Demeter was startled, but spotted Poseidon, and relaxed.

“Oh, hello Poseidon.” Shouldn’t you be in your underwater realm and trying to stop your wife from giving Red Bull to any fish she sees?”

“She’s sleeping,” he said, lying through his teeth. “So, I was just passing through here.”

“Uh huh. Well I was just looking for my flower basket. I think it blew over here. Have you seen it?”

“You mean this one?” He held up the basket.

“Yes, thank you.” Demeter took the basket from him. She turned to leave.

“Wait, I was thinking. You’re single, and I’m... available, and I need a new… person in my life and-.”

“You’re married, Poseidon.”

“Well… still. What do you want? I can get you pearls, jewels, gold, anything.

Darn, Demeter thought. This guy is just like Zeus. Changing from one relationship to another. I need a serious man in my life, not powerful, like Zeus or Poseidon, but mature! One that will marry me, and not have other relations with other girls, no matter how hot they are!

These gods sure aren’t like that! Once they see someone young and pretty, it’s ditch-the-wife-and-pretend-you’re-not-seeing-anyone-else! I know; I’ve watched Hera. And this is why she’s so angry all the time. I don’t want to end up like that! I’m always quiet because I don’t want to get involved with anyone just to be crushed, like Zeus did to me. The only reason that Hera is still with Zeus, is because she knows she won’t get any other guy from her reputation!

I’m definitely not hooking up with Poseidon. He’s trying to bribe me with gold and pearls. I don’t need anything except simple clothes and food. I need to get him off of this subject and distract him.

Demeter pretended to think. “Hmm…well… you know what I would want? I want you to create the most beautiful animal that has ever walked the earth! One that won’t eat other animals, (ugh! Every animal should be vegetarian!) and one that is peaceful and kind.” That should distract him!

“Sure!” said Poseidon. How hard can it be?  “I’ll get right to work.” He jumped off of Mount Olympus and dove in the water where he could think more.

Poseidon’s first thought was to create a small fish. It would have vivid colors, like red, orange, and gold! She would love that! It’ll have a curvy tail and snout, not like any other fish in this ocean!

When Poseidon was finally done, he put the creature in a small clear tank filled with water, and brought it to Olympus for Demeter to see. He found her still weaving. “Look here! I’ve created an animal that has great beauty, and doesn’t eat meat! It is called a…hippocampus!”

Demeter saw it, and agreed that the hippocampus was very exquisite indeed. But to get Poseidon to work harder, she said “It is very pretty, but it is too small, and the name is too long. Try again.”

Poseidon wasn’t discouraged. He let the hippocampus stay in the ocean, even though Demeter didn’t want it. It was so small and peaceful that it couldn’t create any harm. Then he got to work, again. This time, he created a much larger land animal that will eat tree leaves and grass. For the beauty, it will have brown spots all over its body.

When he was done, Poseidon brought the animal to Demeter. He couldn’t present it in a tank because it was so big! Instead, he let it float next to him on the way to Olympus.

Demeter was shocked. A very large creature had just been laid in front of her. “What’s that?!” she gasped.

“This,” announced Poseidon “Is a giraffe! The most beautiful animal in the world! It eats grass and tree leaves. It’s completely harmless.”

“Uh huh.” Demeter didn’t think so. “But this is a little…too big. And I don’t like the brown spots on it.”

Poseidon sighed. “Okay. I’ll try a new approach.” Liking the giraffe, and not wanting to destroy it, Poseidon brought the new animal to a continent that had plenty of grass and trees. When he got to Africa, he created another giraffe, but this one was female. And Poseidon let the giraffes live peacefully in Africa.

I’ll make another animal that is like the giraffe, but like Demeter said, it’ll be smaller and not have spots. Instead it’ll have… stripes! Black stripes and a white body. It’ll also live in Africa, along the mortals. I don’t know why Demeter didn’t believe me when I said the giraffe was harmless. All it does is eat and sleep. So Poseidon got to work, once again.

The new animal had a snout similar to the giraffe and hippocampus, but had a shorter neck than the giraffe, and less vivid colors than the hippocampus. It was pretty much the same thing as the giraffe, except it had the qualities that Demeter wanted.

“I will call you zebra. And if Demeter doesn’t like you, I’ll put you in Africa with the giraffe.” Again, Poseidon brought Demeter his new creation. “I give you the zebra.” He said when he found her.

“Oh! That… that’s a nice looking creature. But I don’t like the stripes. Just leave the animal plain. And have different colors.” With that, she disappeared before Poseidon could say anything to her.

Poseidon was tired of all the imperfections he was making. He decided to try one more time, and then just leave the animal like it is, no matter what Demeter thought.

The animal he had in mind was plain in beauty, going to have different matte colors, and a lot like a zebra. He created five different colored ones: black, grey, white, chestnut, and honey. The creatures were all muscular, had wavy manes, and straight tails. They looked like they could hurt you, but Poseidon created their strength and stamina for helping mortals in their farm work.

For the last time, Poseidon rose up to the heavens with five strong and beautiful animals next to him. Then he found Demeter sitting in her flower garden.

 When she saw Poseidon, she thought, this guy never gives up, does he? He needs something better to do with his time, like controlling the seas, making sure nothing happens. I bet Amphitrite has been in charge the past week. Has he even looked at the water since? It’s polluted with used Coke and Sprite cans. After this new animal, I’m just going to tell him to back off and spend more time with his wife!

But Demeter never did tell Poseidon anything, because she was speechless. Five of the most beautiful animals had just trotted up to her, followed by Poseidon, grinning. “Five colors, five beauties. These are horses, give of take. It’s my last offer.”

Demeter could have easily said that she hated them, and never have to deal with Poseidon again, but she was honest. “These mammals are the most beautiful animals in the world. Great job, Poseidon.” She then turned into a white mare, and galloped away. Poseidon transformed into a black stallion, and followed her.

A few weeks later, Demeter gave birth to the immortal horse, Arion, the fastest horse in the world, and Despoine, the goddess of mysteries. Poseidon had gotten his wish, and Demeter had hers. He sent pairs of horses all around the world, to work with mortals, and also to live in the wild.

He then decided that the hippocampus should be called a sea horse, instead, because it resembled a horse, but was a fish. So the horse would be recognized on land and in the sea. All around, mortals and gods saw the horse for its beauty, strength, and gentleness. They also now see Poseidon as King of the Seas, Bringer of Earthquakes, and the Father of Horses.